I recently heard a comedian talking about how politicians cannot bring themselves to say that something failed. He commented that after the huge failure of a social program the politician says, “It’s not a failure, it’s just a long term lack of success”. Funny yes, but more often than not that is the response of our culture to failing or coming up short. The “failure is not an option” mindset is undermining the success of our organizations, whether it be a business organization or a family organization that we are talking about.

Whether I am speaking to a group of managers leading teams of sales people or parents leading a team of children, I have found a common tendency of leaders to do everything possible to avoid failure and heap ridicule and shame on anyone that fails at a task or project. Now, I am not saying that we want our teams to fail, of course we want everyone to succeed. What I would like to suggest is that the long term success and growth of an individual or a team is driven by how they respond to less than successful experiences. I think I can truthfully say that 100% (not 99.5%) of my growth and development (personally and professionally) has come from what I have learned during the less than successful times. When I succeed I am doing the happy dance and pounding my chest. When I fail at something, make a mistake or just come up short, I am doing an analysis into what happened and how I can insure I do not make that mistake again. If you want your team or your kids to succeed and grow they have to be given the opportunity to try new things and stretch their capabilities. If they do not feel the freedom to fail and make mistakes then they are less likely to even take the chance.

I love the imagine that I have in my mind each time I think of “Failing Forward”.  It is one of someone falling down, but making the effort to at least fall in the direction of where they want to go. Then, when they get up and try again they are at least facing the direction they intended to go. I first heard this term from leadership expert John Maxwell and I often quote it to myself and others when we need reminding that failing at something is not a problem. Failing to learn from failing at something is the problem. Here are three things you can do to improve performance of yourself and your team through failure and mistakes.

1. Fail Forward – develop an attitude and communicate often that growing and improving is your main objective. I have found that if I am growing and improving then my performance is growing and improving. If failure or mistakes occur take the time to analyze what happened and how it could be done differently in the future. View setbacks as an investment in that persons education.

2. Make all New Mistakes Today – my son once came to me and told me he had made a mistake and had really messed things up. As I listened to his explanation of what happened it occurred to me that he was expecting to be “in trouble” with me. The truth hit me then that if I punished him for this mistake I would remove the desire in him to try new things or take a risk, instead he would take the safe path for fear of disappointing me. Instead, I showed him how to analyze what had happened by asking him what he learned from this experience. What were his motives in doing this? How could he have done it differently? And then I told him to remember what we have just talked about and let’s make all new mistakes today; meaning, don’t make the same mistakes again and again. That will get you “in trouble” with me.

3. View Failure as Feedback – it was reported that when Thomas Edison was asked how he persisted through so many failures of the light bulb that he said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” How you view your failures, mistakes and setbacks communicates a lot to those around you. If you want people (at work or at home) to grow and develop and become the very best they can be then they have to have the freedom to fail, but then take the learning from those setbacks and put them to work as feedback on how to do it better next time.

Thomas Watson, the founder of IBM, once called an executive leader from the organization to his office after the failure of a new product that had cost the company millions. The executive was sure he was to be fired and had prepared himself for that certainty. When the executive arrived in Mr. Watson’s office he commented, ” I guess you are going to fire me.” Watson’s response is priceless and a great reminder for us all. Mr Watson responded, “Fire you!! I just spent millions educating you, now don’t let it happen again!”

All failure is feedback and an education about what does not work. Encourage those that you serve to stretch and try new things and when they come up short encourage them to fail forward, take the learning and try again. Don’t waste the investment you are making in their personal development.

This has been a very educational week for me. First it was the US Marines showing me lessons on leadership and life, and now it is Thomas Jefferson showing me lessons on growing and learning. After leaving the Marine ceremonies I headed to the home of Thomas Jefferson at Monticello. I have seen a lot of the presidential sites over the years, but I have never had the opportunity to visit Monticello, and I really have not known a lot about Thomas Jefferson.

After spending the day at Monticello and the University of Virginia, which Thomas Jefferson founded, I put together a list of Mr. Jefferson’s thoughts on learning, leading and growing. He was brilliant to say the least, and the lessons he left for us are lessons that can make a difference in our lives today.

1. Reading Books – Jefferson was a voracious reader. His library was so impressive that it was the starting point for what we now know as the Library of Congress. He has been quoted as saying:

• “I cannot live without books”
• “Books constitute capital…”

Lesson for you and me, spend some time each day reading. You can learn from your own experiences for sure, but you can also learn from what others have experienced. Read more!

2. Time Management – The tour guide at Monticello said that Jefferson was not one to waste daylight. He rose early and was very productive during his waking hours. Jefferson said:

• “Determine never to be idle…It is wonderful how much may be done if we are always doing.”

Lesson for you and me, have a plan and execute the plan. Run your day or your day will run you. A real truth for me in this area has been to deliberately recognize that when I say yes to one thing (or everything) I have by default said no to something else. If I can remember this it becomes a lot easier to say no to the things I should say no to.

3. Take Action – Jefferson was a man of action. He read and studied on a wide variety of topics and when something needed doing he was quick to take action. In his home at Monticello was an impressive display of artifacts brought back to him by Lewis & Clark. Jefferson took bold action to commission the expedition that opened up the western half of the United Stated. He said:

• “Do you want to know who you are? Don’t ask. Act! Action will delineate and define you.”

4. Be Prepared – As I looked around his home and property at Monticello, there seemed to be very little the man could not do. From his tremendous gardens to the manufacturing of nails (5000 -10,000/day) for construction, there seem to be no end to his ingenuity. Jefferson like to say:

• “I’m a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it.”

5. Attitude Matters – Jefferson faced many challenges and trials in his life. Of his 6 children only two lived to adulthood. His wife died after only 10 years of marriage. In spite of the enormous challenges he faced he was able to accomplish great things. Jefferson said:

• “Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.”

Lesson for you me, pay attention to your attitude. It is really easy in these trying times to focus on the negative and not the positive. Determine today to be known for your positive attitude. Attitude matters, it is the difference maker in almost every situation of life.

6. Pursue Excellence – Jefferson said, “Whenever you do a thing, act as if all the world were watching”.  Details matter. Execution matters. It is easy sometimes to think that no one notices what you do, but why should that matter. Do whatever you do like the whole world was watching, it will help you to raise your game. A good test of this is to start a blog. You feel like only a couple of people even know about it, but with the power of the world wide web the whole world could indeed be watching.

As I made my way out of Monticello and headed down the hill to return to the parking area I had to pass by the Jefferson family cemetery.  I found it interesting that it was Jefferson’s wish, as one author put it, “that his tomb stone reflect the things that he had given the people, not the things that the people had given to him.” So things like being president of the United States or ambassador to France are not listed among what he thought were his greatest accomplishments. Here is how his tombstone reads

HERE WAS BURIED

THOMAS JEFFERSON

AUTHOR OF THE

DECLARATION

OF AMERICAN INDEPENDENCE

OF THE

STATUTE OF VIRGINIA

FOR

RELIGIOUS FREEDOM

AND FATHER OF THE

UNIVERSITY OF VIRGINIA

BORN APRIL 2, 1743 O.S.

DIED JULY 4. 1826

Question: What lessons have you learned from our country’s founding fathers?